


Cracking Jokes, Telling Stories

by orphan_account



Category: Adventure Time
Genre: F/F, Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-19
Updated: 2020-12-18
Packaged: 2021-03-10 23:07:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 4,586
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28165239
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Princess Bubblegum brings Marceline along with her to a trade meeting, but the trip takes a turn when Marceline's boredom takes control.
Relationships: Princess Bubblegum/Marceline
Comments: 1
Kudos: 34





	1. Chapter 1

“Princess Bubblegum, if your friend continues to be a distraction, we’re going to have to ask her to leave.” 

I sat up straight at the sound of my name, despite not paying attention at all to what the princess of the Cheese Kingdom was saying. “Uh...” 

The Cheese Princess looked at her with disappointment. “Your friend,” she repeated. “Miss Abadeer.” 

“Oh, right, my um... my friend. Yes,” I stammered, feeling my face heat up. 

Much to my dismay, the rest of the meeting attendees snickered among themselves. 

The Cheese Princess shot a disapproving glare at Marceline, who was drifting lazily behind me and playing with my hair. 

I glanced back at her, and she rolled her eyes and sat back in her chair, pushing it all the way back and resting her feet on the table. She crossed her arms and grumbled, “You people are no fun.” 

This remark was ignored by the Cheese Princess, who continued talking to the group about various resources and trade. 

After some convincing, I had allowed Marceline to tag along with her to her trade meeting at the Cheese Kingdom. I don’t know why Marceline had been so keen to come along with me; I’d warned the adventure-loving and admittedly hyperactive Vampire Queen that she would find it insanely boring once she realized there was nothing to do except sit there and take notes. 

Fifteen minutes in, and I could already tell that Marceline was growing restless. She would spend the first ten minutes or so doodling little monsters on a piece of paper that she picked up from the center of the table before she broke the tip of her pencil. She had since then taken to messing with me, which made it incredibly hard to focus. I didn’t mind it, though; even I was admittedly growing bored as the minutes turned into an hour and so on. 

Of course, the two of us had occasionally been called out for “causing distraction”, which mostly consisted of Marceline whispering something to me and then letting out a small laugh. One thing would lead to another, and we would then find ourselves giggling uncontrollably, only to be stopped by the Cheese Princess. 

Marceline would only remain silent for a few minutes before letting her arms fall to her sides, leaning over slightly and whispering, “This place stinks.” She wrinkled her nose in distaste. 

I grabbed Marceline’s hand and squeezed it lightly. “I know you’re bored. Just hang in there, okay?” 

I turned my attention back to Cheese Kingdom’s princess, who droned on endlessly. 

Even I was having a tough time paying attention, and that was uncommon for me. I was usually perfectly attentive, but something about Marceline’s presence was affecting my ability to sit still for an extended period of time. 

After a few minutes of this, Marceline leaned over to me once more and whispered, “Do you think she ever has to execute anyone? Like, beheading cheese criminals or something?” 

I shrugged. If the princess had brought it up at some point during the meeting, I definitely wasn’t paying any attention at all to it. 

“Because... if she does... would she technically be cutting the cheese?” 

I snorted at the childish nature of the joke, and thought nothing more of it. However, for some reason, when Marceline chuckled a bit at her own joke, I was thrown into a fit of giggles. 

This was met by more looks of disapprobation from the other attendees, and the Cheese Princess finally cleared her throat to get our attention. 

I winced, preparing myself for the coming lecture, but Marceline simply said, “I suppose it’s off with our heads...?” 

Despite being put on the spot, I couldn’t help but laugh. 

This was met by a glare of near anger from the Cheese Princess, but she calmed herself down before politely addressing me. “Princess, please step aside and have a word with your friend. Let her know that we don’t appreciate our guests acting like that.” 

“Yes, ma’am. I’ll be sure to let her know.” I promptly stood up and grabbed Marceline’s hand, nearly pulling her out of her chair and whisking her out of the room in which the meeting was being held. 

Marceline stood with her back to the wall and her hands in her pockets. “How do you deal with that every month?” 

“Honestly, I don’t know,” I answered. “I guess I’ve never really annoyed her.” 

“I mean, like, the meetings!” Marceline cried, throwing her arms up in the air. “Everyone’s so uptight! I could barely breathe in there, the atmosphere was so tense.” 

“I told you it’d be boring.” 

She groaned. “Boring is an understatement. This is the most uninspiring, unstimulating, monotonous, unexciting-” 

“I applaud your broad use of vocabulary, but those are all synonyms for the word ‘boring’,” I noted, amused. 

“My point exactly. Now, I suppose it’s time for you to scold me for my poor etiquette?” 

I rolled my eyes. “Whatever. It wouldn’t hurt to hang out here for a few minutes. It’s not like anything important was happening.” 

She smirked and raised an eyebrow. “Dang, Bubblegum. Breaking the rules today, aren’t we?” 

“There’s no rule against taking a five-minute break,” I snapped, though I was honestly unsure. “Besides, we could use some fresh air.” 

“There is no ‘fresh air’ in the Cheese Kingdom.” 

This was true. The smell produced by cheese-eating bacterium constantly lingered. “I know. I just don’t want back in that room for a bit.” 

“You and me both, girl,” Marceline laughed airily. 

We stood silently in the hallway and thought for several seconds. 

She finally spoke. “We should bail!” 

“Absolutely not!” Was she crazy? I’d never missed a trade meeting in my life, and I didn’t plan on it anytime soon. 

She groaned. “But it’s awful here! It smells like feet, and the people stink, too! Metaphorically and physically!” 

“Then you can go home,” I suggested. “I’m going to go back in a few minutes, with or without you.” 

“But you don’t want to be here, either!” 

I opened my mouth but froze before she could speak. Did I want to be here? 

“I’m not wrong, am I?” Marceline patted the side of my arm encouragingly. 

I sighed. “Fine, but I will be very angry if this backfires.” 

Marceline threw her arms into the air and celebrated. “Heck, yeah!” 

“Shh!” I hissed, looking around. “Don’t draw too much attention! I don’t want anyone to think I’m doing anything, like, illegal.” 

“Oh, right, I forgot. You have a reputation to maintain,” Marceline rolled her eyes jokingly. 

Marcy took my hand in hers, and we started making our way through the dully colored, orange-and-yellow halls. I had already begun to question why I’d agreed to come along. I wasn’t usually the type to find myself giving in to peer pressure; why should my interactions with Marceline be an exception? 

As unlikely as it seems, it was probably because I looked up to Marceline in a way. Despite her aloof and carefree personality, she was one of the most passionate people I’d ever met. Everything she did was purposeful and filled with emotion, even when that purpose was as simple and idle as keeping herself from a state of boredom. It seemed like every single action she took tied back to a point in her life in which her emotions were deeply affected. Marcy exclusively spent time on the things she loved, and didn’t understand anything if it wasn’t somehow connected to something she cared about. 

Despite the one-track nature of this mindset, I couldn’t help but admire the way Marceline’s mind worked, and that was that. So what if she could be distracting? I didn’t care. Being around the Vampire Queen makes me happy. If Marceline could make time for the things she really cared about, why can’t I? 

“So... where to, princess?” Marceline eventually asked. 

I thought about this for a bit. What do people normally do after sneaking out of trade meetings? I decided to simply answer, “I thought you were the one with all the ideas.” 

“Alright, alright,” Marceline chuckled. “Say, I know a neat place near here.” 

“Sounds good. Is it out of the sun?” 

Marceline nodded, then smirked. “One problem, though... we might have to break a few rules to get there.” 


	2. Chapter 2

“Woo-hoo!” 

Marceline’s triumphant cry rang through the tunnel as her and I made our escape in one of the minecarts they’d found at the underground minecart station that passed through the Cheese Kingdom. 

The further from the station they moved, the quicker and bumpier the ride became. 

“Marcy,” I had wrapped her arms around Marceline’s waist and shut her eyes tightly. “I’m not sure how much I like this idea...” 

“Relax, Bonnie!” Marceline shouted over the chaotic sound of the minecart’s wheels and the air rushing past us. “It’s perfectly safe!” 

I hesitantly opened one of my eyes and looked up at Marcy, who had her hands up in the air. “Those are pretty bold words for someone who’s holding her arms up like a kid on a roller coaster!” 

Marceline simply laughed at this. 

Having convinced me to ditch my trade meeting at the Cheese Kingdom, Marceline had decided to take me down into the rock candy mines. Had I known that her plan had involved sneaking past the cheese guards, hijacking a minecart, and hurling it down the track in the tunnel at a scary-fast speed, it is quite possible that I would never have agreed to sneak out of the meeting in the first place. Heck, I probably wouldn’t have even brought her along 

The ride became smoother and started accelerating more steadily, so I was gaining the confidence to finally let go of Marceline and instead held on to the side of the minecart. After the initial swarm of butterflies in my stomach, it wasn’t actually all that scary. 

“Don’t be scared,” Marceline paused her shouts of excitement, glancing at me over her shoulder. “Put up your hands! Feel the wind in your hair!” 

I reached back and yanked out the hair tie holding my hair up in a ponytail and leaned over the side so I could get a look at the tunnel in front of us. I realized it wasn’t bad at all; I would even go as far as to say I was enjoying it. 

A smile spread across my face. Even though we were just speeding down the rail in an illegally acquired minecart, it was the most amazing experience I’d had in a long time. 

Marceline laughed. “See? It’s not so bad!” 

“Not so bad? This is awesome!” 

“That’s the spirit!” Marceline grinned. 

We continued speeding down the track in the dimly lit tunnel. 

It was safe to say I was having the time of my life. I couldn’t remember the last time I’d felt this excited; I wouldn’t say I’m the type of person to actively seek a rush of adrenaline, and I often went as far as to deny such experiences. But here, with her, I felt nothing but sheer joy as we moved quite possibly faster than I had traveled in the entirety of my life. 

I saw a turn up ahead, and after a few quick calculations it suddenly it occurred to me that, with the amount of momentum they were building up, the minecart would not easily change direction. 

I tapped Marceline on the back. “How do you plan on stopping this thing?” 

Rather than answering my question, Marceline whipped around planted her lips on mine, briefly placing her hand on the side of my face. Had there not been immense amounts of adrenaline coursing through my veins as I began to panic, the sensation associated with the gesture may have been nice. In any case, my train of thought met a screeching halt. After a second or two, she pulled away. “What?” 

I had barely enough time to collect my thoughts before the minecart suddenly jerked to the side, sending the two of us flying quite a distance away from the track. The minecart traveled a few more feet before falling off the track and crashing into the bricks that lined the wall. I had expected this exact course of events, and could have quite possibly stopped it (or at least lessened the effects) if I had been provided more time. 

I landed flat on my back, but Marceline caught herself and was floating about a foot above the ground. 

I groaned and sat up, instinctually reaching for my head despite not hitting it too hard. She glanced up at Marcy. 

Almost as soon as she looked at me, Marceline started laughing hysterically. “That was great!” She wheezed, drifting closer to me. 

I sat in shock for several more seconds, the air knocked out of me and panicked thoughts still running through my mind, the last several seconds replaying in my head at half-speed as I tried to wrap my mind around it. 

Looking at Marceline, who was clearly having the time of her life laughing about the situation, I realized it wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be. We were having fun. 

Despite all of the irony, I found it in me to laugh along. 

The two of us just sat there in the dimly lit tunnel for a while, giggling uncontrollably, and though we were barely capable of forming basic words and phrases, the exchange of looks and laughter said more in that moment than a million words could. 

Eventually, after several minutes, we were able to stop laughing. I sighed and started looked around, still sitting on the ground, before suddenly passing out. 


	3. Chapter 3

When I woke up, the area around me was the exact same- the mines that passed from the Candy Kingdom through the Cheese Kingdom and led to the Rock Candy Mountains. We had hijacked a minecart and taken it through the tunnel, just to crash at a sharp turn. 

Marceline drifted above me, her face inches away from mine. “Have a nice nap?” She joked. 

I blinked a few times, sitting up. “I may be concussed,” I deadpanned. 

“Nah, you just fainted.” Marceline offered me her hand. “You were only out for a few seconds.” 

I took her hand and stood up, dusting myself off. “Glob, that was certainly something.” 

“Yeah, I almost passed out myself,” She teased. “One of us has to stay conscious, though.” 

Ignoring this remark, I stood up and looked around, my hands on my hips. “So... I suppose we have to find our way back?” 

Marceline thought about this for a second, before flipping around in the air. “Don’t you wanna look around a bit?” 

“I mean, I’ve been down here before. These mines are technically my property.” 

She snorted. “You might have designed them, but I don’t think you’ve actually explored them. If you had, you probably wouldn’t let me down here at all.” 

“What’s that supposed to mean?” I demanded. She’d been down here before? Why? 

She just shrugged. 

“Marcy, what did you do?” 

She laughed and floated to the ground before she stepped over to the crashed minecart. “Do you think we can move this? I think there’s an opening behind there, and I wanna check it out.” 

I realized Marceline was ignoring my question and trying to change the subject, but finished dusting myself off and decided to go lend her a hand anyways. 

I grabbed one of the minecart’s wheels and started pulling. Marceline had wedged herself between the edge of the cart and the wall, pushing. We heaved with all our might, but it only moved a few inches. I stepped back, and Marceline floated to her side. 

I looked around. “I’m sure we can get it out if we decrease the force to mass ratio. Is there something we can use as leverage?” 

“Hmm… leverage…” Marceline muttered to herself thoughtfully. “Stand here. I have an idea.” She squeezed into the spot against the wall that she had occupied before. 

“Marceline, I doubt trying again by yourself is going to-” 

I stopped talking as she noticed that Marceline’s form was beginning to grow and change, morphing into a dark, winged, mammalian creature. Apparently, with this form came new strength, because Marceline was able to easily move the minecart, revealing the rest of a somewhat small hole in the wall that led to a dark room behind. 

Marceline returned to her original form and leaned against the minecart, a smug smile on her face. 

“Whoa!” I exclaimed. “How did you...?” 

“Vampire powers,” Marceline explained simply, turning around and disappearing into the small tunnel that branched off the main one. 

I stood awestruck for several more seconds, before realizing Marceline was gone and running after her. 

The tunnel appeared to be a partially collapsed, abandoned part of the mine, with various broken rocks scattered around in piles. Marceline was right- I hadn’t personally been in the mines for several months- with the exception of an “emergency inspection” I was called down for a few weeks ago because someone had been spray-painting the walls. To say the least, I wasn’t happy about this, but I had accepted that there was nothing that could be done about it. Whoever had painted the walls with graffiti was clearly doing a good job of masking their identity and not getting caught. Sure, they had found empty cans and caps laying around, but nothing gave us a clue as to who it was. 

I inspected the branch of the tunnel, while Marceline dug around and pushed over rubble, clearly looking for something. 

“Aha!” Marceline tugged at a bag that had been buried under a few rocks. “I knew I left it down here somewhere!” 

“What is it?” I inquired, trying to get a look. 

Marcy unzipped the bag and took out a spray can with a white cap. 

I stared at it, confused for a bit, before gasping. “So you’re the one who’s been sneaking down here and drawing on the walls!” 

Marceline simply smiled and shook the can. 

“Marceline, that’s illegal!” 

She stuck out her tongue. “What’re you gonna do about it? It’s not like you’d arrest me.” 

Admittedly, she had a point. 

Marceline picked up the bag and slung the strap over her back. “Let’s go find a good place to do this.” 

I crossed my arms. “Whoa, you don’t seriously expect me to assist you in committing vandalism?” 

“Why not?” Marceline shrugged. “You said it yourself, it’s your property.” 

I found myself once again unable to argue. I snatched the white paint can and walked to the back of the wall, muttering passive-aggressively under my breath. If I was breaking the rules, why not break all of them? 

“That’s the spirit!” Marceline’s voice was filled with encouragement. 

I took off the cap and held the can a few inches from the wall, then froze. “What do I even write?” 

“Anything. Express yourself however you want.” 

I sighed and thought for a little while. Eventually, I came up with an idea, and looked back at Marceline, who smiled expectantly. 

I nodded and turned back to the wall, standing up on the tips of my toes, and started writing, looping wide, cursive letters. Each line was near flawless, each letter smoothly connecting into the next. The writing withheld no particular artistic flair, but it certainly expressed how I felt at that moment. 

When I finally finished, I set down the can, dusted my hands, and stood back to admire my work. 

Marceline giggled adorably upon reading it. “Bubblegum, you huge dork.” 

“Marceline made me write this,” the words scrawled across the wall read, “-Bonnibel Bubblegum.” 


	4. Chapter 4

I sighed as I watched Marceline spray paint various shapes on the brick walls that lined a lot of the underground tunnels. “I can’t believe I’m watching you vandalize an active mine. My active mine.” 

“It’s not vandalism if it’s consensual,” Marceline turned to me and winked before continuing outlining the doodle of a fanged bat monster. 

“I technically never gave consent,” I pointed out. 

Marceline finished off the doodle. “Consent is sort of implied when you stand there and do nothing about it, and you have yet to say ‘Marcy, please stop painting the walls’.” 

I opened the mouth to argue, but was cut off by someone shouting frantically. 

“Collapse! Collapse in the eastern tunnel!” 

Marceline and I looked at each other. 

“Bonnie…?” She asked uneasily, dropping the spray paint can. “Aren’t we in the eastern tunnel?” 

I didn’t answer; I simply looked back in the direction we came. 

The minecart crash must have hit a weak spot, because rocks and larger chunks of the ceiling were cracking and hitting the ground, creating a cloud of dust. A small group of little candy people wearing hard hats were running in our direction. 

“Princess!” One of them shouted, “Princess, we’re sorry- we got a report that one of the minecarts was on the loose, and we went looking for it and found it crashed into a wall, and we were just trying to put it back but… but the crash caused a lot of damage.” 

“Uh…” My eyes darted to Marceline, who wore a mixed expression of guilt and amusement. “Is it a full collapse or partial?” 

“It should be partial, ma’am, but… It’s destabilized the whole eastern tunnel. We’ll have to evacuate.” 

Upon the sound of the word “evacuate,” the rest of the group of candy people started running. 

I grabbed Marceline’s hand, and we ran along with the group. Small amounts of dust and rocks shook loose from the ceiling, but larger chunks fell closer to the crash site. The further we ran, the more rocks and soil were in our way, and larger were the bricks and debris that fell. 

“It’ll be okay!” I yelled. “We just gotta keep moving!” 

And fast, I added in my mind. The entire tunnel was engineered to be sturdy, so it wouldn’t completely collapse, but the dust and bricks that fell would be quite a hazard for anyone there at the moment. We wouldn’t be able to return to the eastern tunnel until we were a hundred percent sure that the branch was stabilized. 

We followed the rail to a bridge with a minecart track over it. 

“Go, go, go!” I shouted, letting go of Marceline and urging them across the bridge. 

The candy people and Marceline all made it across to safety, and I was preparing to run across myself when a particularly large boulder crashed down and destroyed the bridge. I took in a sharp, panicked breath and immediately started choking on dust. I evaluated my options- stay here and risk being hit by rubble, or jump. Either way, I was scared. 

“Bonnie!” Marceline called out in horror, skidding to a halt and turning around. She started flying my way. 

“No!” I stopped coughing and called out without thinking. “It’s too dangerous! Fly along and make sure the workers are okay!” 

She was clearly conflicted in her decision, but I didn’t have time to lose making sure she did what I asked. 

After a few quick calculations, I stepped back a few feet. I would either fall short or get hit by another rock on my way- both of which had a higher possibility of happening than me actually landing safely on the other side. 

Regardless, I took a deep breath, and ran. 

“Bonnie!” Marceline cried again. “You’re not going to make it!” 

Yes, I would! I was just a few inches from falling into the crack when I pushed off with my feet, flinging myself through the air. I felt my feet hit the ground briefly. 

My heart sank as I felt myself slip, and instead held onto the other side with my arms. 

I kicked my legs, trying to get ahold of the side of the fissure to pull myself up, but I instead slipped further. 

Suddenly, something grabbed my arm, and I was pulled up to safety, immediately finding myself face-to-face with none other than Marceline, whose usual cool expression of taunting or joking was replaced with one of sincere shock and worry. 

“Are you okay?” She inspected me carefully and brushed a bit of my hair out of my face. 

My legs were still shaking, but after I took a deep breath I was able to answer. “Don’t be ridiculous; of course I am,” I laughed airily. “Needless to say, though, that- that was the most terrifying experience I’ve ever come across.” 

I suddenly remembered that the tunnel was still at risk of collapsing, and almost fell forward, to be caught by Marcy. 

“Be careful,” she reminded me. I was surprised that I couldn’t detect a single ounce of teasing. She was dead serious. It worried me slightly. 

The group of rock candy miners, Marcy, and I continued running, and soon enough, less and less rocks were falling behind us. The collapse scare came to an eventual stop, and we slowed our pace to a walk. 

After a few minutes of silence, the head miner addressed me. “So, what brings you two down here?” 

I glanced at Marceline. “Uh…” 


	5. Chapter 5

Apparently, we’d lost track of time during our trip to the rock candy mines, because Marceline and I found ourselves walking home in the dark. 

“Do you think the part of the tunnel we crashed near collapsed?” Marceline asked me suddenly. 

I pondered this. “Hmm… nah. The corners are generally built sturdier. I’ll have to make sure to build up the rails so nothing like that happens again, though. It was certainly a scare- I might not let anyone down in the eastern tunnel anymore, which means that the Cheese Kingdom will have to reroute, but they’d have to do it regardless, seeing as the bridge was destroyed. The princess won’t be too happy about that, but to be honest, she’s already as upset with me as she’s gonna get. Why do you ask?” 

She shrugged. “I’m just wondering if your tag is still down there.” 

“Oh.” I’d honestly forgotten about it entirely in the excitement of the near-collapse. “Well, sure, but it’s not like anyone’s going to see it anytime soon, though. Probably not even us.” 

Marceline smirked mischievously. “Not if I sneak down there.” 

“Marcy, no. We’ve already caused enough damage. Though…” I kicked the ground. “I did have a lot of fun today, I’ll admit. Maybe we’ll go down there again sometime.” 

She smiled sweetly. 

“Not the eastern tunnel, though. We’re never going to the eastern tunnel again,” I laughed. 

“That’s fair,” Marceline chuckled along. “I mean, I’m not sure if I’ll be able to stay away from it forever, but I’ll definitely avoid it for a few centuries. I can finish vandalizing the western tunnel anyway.” 

I rolled my eyes. “Oh yeah, that reminds me,” I clapped my hands together firmly. 

“What’s that?” 

I took a few steps in front of her and looked her dead in the eyes. “Marceline Abadeer, you are hereby under arrest for vandalism of Candy Kingdom property.” 

“What- I didn’t-” she stammered, an amused look in her eyes. 

“You have the right to remain silent,” I continued, though it was hard not to laugh, “And anything you say can and will be used against you in the court of law…” 

Marceline groaned lightheartedly. “But Bonnie-” 

“Princess Bubblegum,” I corrected 

“But princess, you painted the wall, too!” 

“Yeah, you’re right,” I admitted. “I, too, am under arrest.” 

Marceline was set off howling with laughter. 

**Author's Note:**

> For those who don't know, this is based on the past events described by Marceline in s7 e2, "Varmints".


End file.
